Can YOU hear the roar in my ears?It is loud and windy,
like the ocean.
Give me a beach to walk
right now.
Cover up this roar in my ears
with real waves.
Make waves fall over me.
Crash and bang and drown.
Bury me in sand
and wind
and waves.
Give me the moment.
Teach me to be.Teach me not to care.
I can hear that roar.
I can feel the coldness.
I can touch the dark sky
and feel the pinprick of stars
hidden behind clouds,
protecting and embracing.
Lose me in rocks
and endless sand.
Bury me where the salt water
plays the shovel.
Take me to this place
where I can just be.
And leave me alone.
"I can touch the dark sky
ReplyDeleteand feel the pinprick of stars
hidden behind clouds,
protecting and embracing."
Love that. I can really feel this post.
Thanks, Suzanne. Clearly last night when I posted this was not one of my happier hours but putting the rawness that was in my head down on paper and visiting the beach re: photo albums certainly helped me regain my balance.
DeleteIt's kind of eerie reading this. I have commented here before about the "white noise" in my head and your version sounds disturbingly/comfortingly similar. I think you may have accidentally given me an insight into the deep sense of well-being and comfort I get from being in, on or near the ocean--especially alone.
ReplyDeleteAnd I know I have commented before on the beach - something very primal there - very soothing. I can disappear at the beach. We have a lot of fairly isolated stretches of coast up here - not places that you necessarily want to actually get in the water - riptides are prevalent - but getting into the water is unnecessary. Jut letting the ocean take care of me is all I ask.
DeleteFor the first thirty years of my life, I was a MOST frequent visitor to the ocean, never living more than 45 minutes from the sea in any of the ten plus addresses I have called "home." I was obsessively compulsive about immersing myself in the water, no matter the time of day, or circumstances surrounding my visits. But in all of the hundreds of times I have enjoyed the ocean experience, I never imagined the setting you described existed. A banquet for thought.
ReplyDeleteThe rock in that last picture? I would have had to find a way to get out there.
Yeah, I don't need to be (don't even particularly like to be) IN the water. Just next to it. Just where I can feel the ocean breeze and smell the sea and hear her voice (and often my own). The rock was actually from a beach I stayed at last summer on the Oregon coast. I was there by myself and it was profoundly beautiful and revealing on my early morning beach walk.
ReplyDeleteThe beach was my haven in our early married years. Being in the Coast Guard, we were always stationed on the water and walking through the sand, good weather and bad, became a solace to my homesick soul. It has lasted through the years. My favorite vacation spot is anywhere I can walk on the beach.
ReplyDeleteYes, Michelle - I know the feeling. I will always choose the beach over other places (except maybe Yosemite from time to time).
DeleteThis business of the wind is quite a Universal theme......Matthew 11.7
ReplyDelete"As they were leaving, Jesus began to speak to the crowds about John. "What did you go out into the wilderness to see? A reed shaken by the wind?" The inner sound.......
Wonderful poem. Full of heart...
Thanks, Noel - I hadn't thought about the wind's significance in this poem but I like your reminder.
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