Tuesday, April 17, 2012

O: October

 Hello, October,
      I know you have read my love letters to April and July.  And I know that you know damn well that there is no love letter coming your way.  I do try to embrace you.  Really I do.  I know so many people who count you among their loved ones but I can't seem to get beyond merely tolerating you.  Those beautiful red, golden, brown, green colors for which you are so revered?  To me they become the funeral flowers for spring and summer.  Every day you cut back my light and that saddens me.  And the thing is, the light you bring in the late afternoon is as sharp and annoying as a sliver of glass on my bare foot.
There is something keenly electric, something physically shocking about often hot dry winds of October.  I don't like them.  They bring crackles and fire to town.

   
          Some people think Halloween makes you the best but I am sure you read my thoughts on that.  In a nutshell, Halloween was okay fifty years ago when it was relatively non commercial and mostly about kids but it has since grown into a greedy, creepy day.  Halloween is no reason for me to love you.



   


     









       And, truly, you sealed your fate in my book when, in mid stride one year, you took my father away.  You didn't even warn us.  You came early in the morning and you took him and for that I can never forgive you.  In fairness, once upon a time, you gave me my mother and you blessed my parents' wedding day but still, you were acting in character when you took my father.

 
      I will continue to tolerate you because that's the kind of person I am.  I am not about hatred or meanness but I can't and won't love everyone, including you.  I certainly won't slam the door on you and I will always look for the good in you but you gotta know, I can't write you a love letter today.

Yours truly,
Gracie


13 comments:

  1. I love October (with the exception of losing your dad, and I am no fan of Halloween). I love the bite of cold after a day of sunshine. I love the leaves changing in a last hurrah before they fall. I love the smell of fireplaces and woodstoves coming on. October is my favorite month of the year. Gorgeous photos!

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  2. Yes, I know, Sarah, I know a number of people who call October their favorite month and I do see some of the positives. I am so much enamored with spring and summer, though, and fall takes them away so there's that. Here's to celebrating our differences!

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  3. I'm very sorry for your loss.

    I guess I've never really had an opinion one way or another about October. As a kid, I loved and looked forward to Halloween, of course, but as an adult, I just see October as the beginning of cooler weather. (I'm not really a fan of summer heat.) On the other hand, I do like the changing colors of the leaves, although I can see your point about them being "funeral flowers for spring and summer." (Love that wording, by the way!)

    Enough rambling. :) I enjoyed this post!

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    1. Thanks, Dana -- I guess I do have this thing about time and which months are the best and which are the worst. Perhaps I need to practice embracing what is? :)

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  4. I love October. I love Halloween and the leaves and the wind and all that fresh air. My husband also lost his father in October, however, and there are times during the month that are hard. Mostly now, though, he is remembered with a smile on the face instead of a tear in the eye.

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    1. As I said to Sarah above, yes, I know a number of people who love October - and , oddly enough, I know people who don't like the summertime! Viva le difference!

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  5. October's all right with me. I love the World Series, no matter who is in it. I hate halloween, but have not had a trick or treater to the house since the nineties, when friends of the kids would occasionally make the drive. Don't like it getting dark earlier, but it doesn't bum me out. And by October, I'm counting the days down to Christmas-still. Splendid post.

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    1. You do have that love affair with Christmas so I can see why October is Mr. Good Guy to you! oh, and the WS! Go, Giants!

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  6. I have no affection for Halloween, but I look forward to October and that first fall holiday which heralds the coming of the Christmas Season. I am a sucker for Christmas, so for me October is the beginning of my favorite time of year, despite the fact that I am a Postal Employee!

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    1. I know that you have always embraced Christmas - you need to put your head together with Mark on that one!
      Thanks for making a comment here!
      xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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  7. Poignant ode to October. If we think about it, I guess any time would bring back bad memories. I forget the time they happened and simply remember the event. Blog on!

    http://francene-wordstitcher.blogspot.com

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    1. Hi Francene! Thanks for stopping by. I know you are right - forget that the tough stuff happened and mover forward... ever my goal.

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  8. I always think of the turning of the leaves as the consolation prize meant to tide us over the dreary winter until spring returns with colors again.

    It sounds like the anniversary of your father's death has left you feeling about October the way I feel about July. I understand completely.

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