I think I want to be someone who has a neat and orderly head. I want to have shelves with ideas stacked neatly, perhaps color coded. There might be a file cabinet for logical reasoning. There might also be a memory closet with memories arranged and retrieved in chronological order. The huge fact bank that I lug around could be condensed in some organized fashion (perhaps like the old time library card catalog - images of which you will find in the memory closet). The Virgo who lives in me says, "Get busy, young lady!"
But really? It's a huge mess - colorful, disorganized, with sounds mingling with images and memories talking too much and too fast. There is a whole lot of "Pay attention to me" going on. The truth is, this messy place, this cacophony, this abstract existence, this blend of real and imaginary? That is my head. And I must acknowledge that all of these forces are actually friendly to me. I like them just the way they are. They loudly remind me that I am alive. Yes, my life is loud and mess. My head proves it. Just the way it is.
I like that. That's kind of the way I feel now, after our kids moving away for about 2 seconds and then moving back AND having Little Boy - - I have this chaotic symphony in my head all day long!
ReplyDeleteBut the big question is: Do you like the music?
DeleteOh, here's to messy heads--long may they rumble and buzz.
ReplyDeleteAnd be tangled and colorful!
DeleteSomething tells me I should just be an observer of life. Interesting piece.
ReplyDeleteWhy?
DeleteI think my head is too neat and organized. I wish I could see the world the way you do.
ReplyDeleteSo much more interesting.
And I wonder why I have so many headaches......
DeleteThanks, Jt for your lively and true post on what our minds actually look like. Mine's like yours, I think, except i seem to focus rather narrowly, at times, on a handful of things, and I try to ignore all the rest. It's the loner in me, who only wants to do what he wants, and none of the other junk.
ReplyDeleteI get that. I just have a ton of things in my head and I want to see and be and do them all.
DeleteMy head and my mind seem to have parted ways, for periods of time recently. Someone else is up in the control room, interfering with conventional forward progress. What the hell am I gonna do, but ride it out?
ReplyDelete