C: Crazy

"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."

     The above quote has been attributed to Steve Jobs.  Perhaps he did write it himself or maybe one of his marketing staff wrote it.  For some reason, it has always appealed to me.  Of course, so do Apple products so go figure....

     That word "crazy" has always resonated with me. I checked it out in my New Oxford American Dictionary  (the world's most trusted dictionary - or so it tells me) and they tell me the following:

crazy:  

1.  mentally deranged, especially as manifested in a wild or aggressive way; extremely    annoyed or angry;  foolish

2.  extremely enthusiastic

3.  appearing absurdly out of place on in an unlikely position;  (archaic) of a ship or building:  full of cracks or flaws; unsound or shakey

    I like that word crazy.  I like that it has broader meanings than mental illness.  I can buy extremely enthusiastic.  Would that be like passionate? Even though I might hide my passions, they do drive me in ways that even I can't always see or understand. That would suggest that I might be "crazy".  I do imagine.  I do create.  I can stare at a piece of watercolor paper and see bold, LOUD art.  I am getting better and better at breaking the rules.  Perhaps that means I am getting crazier with age?

    I can buy appearing absurdly out of place - a misfit, yes - but who am I kidding?  I may be an internal misfit but clearly, to the world, I am stable, conventional (at least by this county's standards) and well within the range of "normal".  As much as I might buy the romantic notion of misfit, I am not brave enough to be one in the world.  I don't think I push the human race forward but I do hold it up, one child at a time.  And, in that way, I am crazy. But I am not crazy enough to think I might change the world.  No, that is a huge job.  I am not that crazy.  Damn!