Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Why Write?

     The blogging world threw out a question the other day that was worth my consideration.  Tangled Lou wondered in print why do we do what we do?  Specifically, she was curious about the details of her readers' writing lives.  Why do we write?  How do we decide about what to write? Do we wait for inspiration or do we just write?  Is there an editing process for our writing?  Compose on the computer or with pen and paper?  Does your mind shut off when you write or is it alive?

    My answers are essentially yes.  I write for lots of reasons.  My work world is full of writing and that writing is very clear cut.  It is purpose driven and needs to be well thought out, organized, succinct,  engaging and without mechanical error.  It often becomes public so I always keep my audience in mind when I write at work.   However, although I never object to communicating at work, that sort of writing is not the same as the recreational writing that I most enjoy.

    I write daily.  The first thing I do every morning is to check my email and respond to whomever I see there - my sister, any one of my brothers, my children, my cousins, one or two very close friends.  On a typical morning, I will wake myself up over an hour's time with solitary writing and reading.  In large part that is about staying in touch with my people but it is also a forum for me,  a place to begin something that will later take on a new direction.   I often return to my keyboard at the end of my work day and review some idea that I started in the morning.  There are so many unfinished posts on my homepage.  I hold on to my drafts, all waiting for further inspiration.  Sometimes some idea pops into my head, often while reading something else (a book, another's post, an article I am reading on line or in a periodical), and I throw some words down so that I don't entirely lose the thought.

   I have never felt competent in the fiction world.  I love good stories but I don't know how to tell them.  I  don't know how to make them unfold without seeming contrived.  I don't know how to make a story drive itself.  And, so far, I am not interested in learning how to do that.  I do enjoy reading and playing with poetry.  I like structured poetry but I have to have the challenge put in front of me before I do that.  I like the notion of creating images with words but it is always so personal to me.  I usually can't understand how anyone could make sense of my so called poetry but then I remind myself that my poetry doesn't have to make sense to anyone.  Even me.

    The essay is my favorite form of writing.  I usually do lose myself while writing a blog post, for example.  I just let the words roll off the fingertips onto the keyboard (and, yes, I write on a MacbookPro - his name is MacHenry).  I am ALIVE  when I write - much as I am ALIVE when I paint.  I do not want to be disturbed.  I prefer to be entirely alone when writing or painting.  No distractions. I don't even want another person in the room (though that is often impractical).  I generally write the better part of a post, for example, in one block of time but I will put it away and come back to it the next day or even the next week.  I always do at least a rudimentary edit but often return to the piece the next day to add or remove some thought.

   But WHY do I write?  Fundamentally it is about making something clear to myself, putting a box around whatever it is that won't stop nagging at me.  I do like playing with words, true.  I like to paint pictures with words.  I enjoy the challenge of selecting just the right word for this feeling or this sensation or this fear or this complex idea that is spinning out of control in my head.  I don't write so much for an audience.  I do write for the feeling of achievement and discovery that I often experience.  Sometimes I will be so surprised at something that I wrote.  It will be so perfect yet I am the only one who knows that.  And - here's the embarrassing part - I will go back and read it a year or more later to see if I still like it and, almost always, I will still be moved by that piece of writing.

   I do want to add that I am NOT that impressed with my writing from twenty or more years ago.  When I look at the journals I kept, say when my children were small, or the love letters I wrote in college (and, yes, I have been known to do that) I am not pleased.  I think I was writing for some audience that I didn't really know or trust and it shows.  Now?  Now I write for me.  My writing seems genuine and not designed to impress.  I just like to figure things out.

10 comments:

  1. This is fantastic! I am so excited to read this. I just love every bit of it. Thank you!

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    1. You were the inspiration, my friend! Thank YOU!

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  2. I had all those questions, glad Tangled Lou asked them. Your writing has great variety and range. I have my old journals, but should probably burn them while I can! Save a few selective pages, but not too many...But they served their purpose in helping me believe that someone was listening.

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  3. I also enjoyed reading about your writing process and why you write. We have some similarities. Perhaps as we have aged and gotten to know ourselves better, our voices become more our own? As a younger person I was very un-formed and a late bloomer. Now I don't care as much about what others think. But it's all a learning process for me. If I'm still here in 20 years, my voice may be different, I imagine.

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    1. Agreed - I know I am much more acquainted with myself - I have had time and opportunities to meet me. At 20, I was so unformed. So now I have wisdom and wrinkles - all okay.

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  4. yes, I like the way you write in your blog. I sense you are exploring and having a few moments to play with words, to capture images, ideas and moods. Glad to hear you write for yourself, because that's the reader you need to please! Keep on writing, and I'll give this some thought, too. Why do I write?

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    1. Loved reading your explanation for why you write. I told you this but I reiterate: I am so jazzed that you are now writing where I can read what you write on a daily basis.

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  5. I will join you in your embarrassing part: my family has often found me reading my past blog posts. When I hit the mark, I know it. I want to read it again. And again! Although, my daughter just read my very first blog post and she said it was "weird" because it is not at all the style in which I write now. I'm glad to know I am still growing in my skills!

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    1. We are all still growing - isn't it fun? I do feel kinda weird going back and looking up what I wrote two years ago to the date - but that's part of the bonus in writing, yes?

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  6. I have been way behind on reading blogs this past week or so, but glad to have finally made it here and read your response to Lou's questions. I think a lot of us bloggers/writers have many things in common and it's kind of intriguing how such similar habits and mentalities translate into such unique work in the end.

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