So there's this adage which suggests that most people with regrets tend to regret what they didn't do rather than what they did do. For a long time in my life, I really didn't experience regrets. True, I had an early marriage which ended in a traumatic and wrenching divorce. But by the time I had reached my late 20's, I had come to see that particular marriage and divorce as good things in my life. I had accrued some student loan debt but there were no regrets there. I had my heart broken a few times and I broke a few hearts in my 20's but these were, in no way, regrettable loves. I had selected a career field and gladly sailed off into it.
Life rolled on and another marriage, two children, and a draining career filled my days. I was good at working, good at being an attentive parent, and maybe not so good at being an attentive wife. And now I find myself sitting on the other side of all that and wondering if there are regrets. I know, I know, what good does it do to even consider that but, yes, I think an evaluation is in order. After all, my life is not over yet. I suspect, baring more bike accidents, I might have a good thirty years to float around here. So what about this notion of regretting what I did or did not do?
Not so many regrets on what I did. My children are responsible and valuable members of society. I wanted them and I did my best work with them. I was always glad to go to school. I enjoyed my BA years, loved getting my MA and credentials, enjoyed taking miscellaneous classes along the way. I don't regret, at all, our decision to leave Silicon Valley and raise our family in the quieter, more community based area of Western Sonoma Co. We live in an unbelievably beautiful and tolerant part of the county. Who could ask for more?
So cut to the chase. Are there things I wish I had done? I know there are things I think I SHOULD have done but what about wish I had done? I am still mulling that over. How about you?