Saturday, January 12, 2013

Saturdays and Summers

    I live for Saturdays and summertimes.  Don't get me wrong.  I like lots of parts of my job.  I get a kick out of interacting with the kids (usually) and I very much appreciate the autonomy of my position. I like most of the adults with whom I work and fake it pretty well with the ones I don't particularly like.  I prefer the busy, adrenaline driven kind of days to the slower days when I wade through long range projects but I can and do handle both reasonably well.  I also relish the walk through the seasons that seems to be part of a school climate.

    So why do I live for Saturdays and summertimes?  I think it is, in part, a function of my age.  Truly, immortality seems to be a driving force in my life right now.  I just keep thinking, "Am I using my time well?"  When I was a couple of decades younger, working in the schools was right on for me.  I had passion, energy, vitality.  Those things are still there but their direction has changed.  Now my passion has gone inward.  I no longer want to push for those cultural supports.  I continue to value  education, child health and safety, literacy, and such but I don't want to push so hard.  Now I want to listen.

    Listen to what?   I don't know.  Listen to whatever is speaking to me.  The thing is, it's hard to hear when you are also listening for the bell to ring or listening to the upset child or the angry parent.  It's hard to hear when the chronic pain that seems to be a part of my aging body is yelling at me.  It's hard to hear when I'm tired.  That's why I live for Saturdays and summertimes.  Today, a Saturday, I was able to take a magical dawn walk along the Laguna trail here in town.  When I returned home, I ambled through the morning, doing chores, dealing with a little grocery store action, getting dinner in the crock pot.  But it was a stroll through a quiet morning.  After a silent lunch,  I painted a little and then read until I enjoyed the respite that a nap gives.  More reading later in the day, a simple dinner, some writing, and then there will be a bit more reading before sleep tonight.  All with eyes and ears open.

9 comments:

  1. For a retiree, every day is Saturday, and summer goes all year round...think about it. Just saying.

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    1. Sweet. But I'm not old enough to retire. :)

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  2. Keep listening and nurturing your own impulses, JT. It's healthy, natural & essential. Change is already in play...onward to more Saturdays, more Summertime!

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  3. "Am I using my time well?"—I ask myself that question every day.

    I'm still not sure of my answer.

    Happy Tuesday, friend. :)

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    1. Thanks, Dana. There is something to be said for the awareness that comes with simply asking the question, right?

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    2. Awareness is the foundation on which most good things are built. Without it, why build at all?

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  4. It sounds like you had a luscious Saturday. The peace and quiet came across loud and clear in your description of the day. I can hardly ignore the simple arithmetic of counting the number of years I have lived compared to the number I have yet to live. The scale is so obviously light on the plus side that it makes me think that my priorities should change. But complacency is so darn comfy.

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  5. I have been feeling a little "itchy" to take some time off (and I have PLENTY accrued)--this pushed me over the edge and I'm picking a week soon-ish. Thanks for the inspiration. ;)

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