― Anaïs Nin, Incest: From a Journal of Love
Doesn't that sound cool? If only I could make it be true. On some level, reality does not impress me but it is the stuff of life. I don't know how I can ignore it.
I like the notion that intoxication is the best. I wish ecstasy were my middle name. And ordinary life? He is my guard for sure. It's too scary, or maybe too complicated, to do anything else. I have always been a person who was schooled in the rules. And, really? I suppose they have served me well.
What the hell is wrong with being complacent? With being ordinary? In my head, the world is not ordinary. But that world is walled in and must stay that way. Because reality is safe.
How can we feel ecstasy, or the extraordinary, without ordinary? Soon enough, constant intoxication becomes the norm, then what? Ask drug addicts about their capacity for intoxication and ecstasy--that's the basis for crack heads. As it turns out, there's nothing exactly wrong with ordinary, it's just.....ordinary, know what I mean? We escape it by experiencing the transcendent, the extraordinary, which is a good thing. But most of the time, we spend in day-to-day order. Oh well. It is what it is.
ReplyDeletenothing wrong with it except boring. Nothing wrong with it except dead.
DeleteOnce upon a time I escaped the (my) walls. I took on a new persona and she was called Gracie. I experimented with extravertism (made that one up). I flirted and took a scary chance or two. I spoke up and stood my ground. I threw caution to the wind and danced the Tango with Fernando. (It sounds a lot sexier than it actually was.) :) . But I slowly started to miss my inner quiet peacefulness. I eventually recognized that my reality was safer and that it was much more comforting to snuggle back down under the soft blanket of a graceful Lynda.
ReplyDeleteI liked reading that, Lynda. but you have Ross and Ross knows you and takes younow just the way you are. You are fortunate but I know you know that.
DeleteAnd this is the next day, Lynda - you do have Ross and I am envious - but you are certainly right - I know who I really am and i need to pay attention.
DeleteI've been a little obsessed with the concept of authenticity lately--and reality may not be impressive, but it's certainly authentic. Intoxication intrigues me but only if it is an authentic response to reality--rather than a chemically induced escapist state. Now, I guess the question is how do we make reality more intoxicating?
ReplyDeleteI wish knew.
DeleteAuthentic - now there's a word worth exploring....
DeleteWhat an interesting quote!!
ReplyDeleteI don't think there's anything wrong with being ordinary. I know many people who are both quite ordinary and extraordinary.
How??
Because they are real, they shine with a confidence in who they are and what they believe or as Masked Mom put it they're authentic.
Oh my, you have opened my mind and made me think a bit here, Jen -- of course, this is the next day - the day after the sucky post... I was in a terrible place yesterday (can you tell?). It isn't all gone but your comment is very real. I think I should take that and write a new post. Maybe I will.
DeleteThanks for your feedback.
Oh now! That didn't even come close to a sucky post. It sparked a wonderful discussion, don't you think? I do!!
DeleteAs one who frequently vacillates between practicality and intoxication, this post makes me think. I fear extremes of any kind. I think that's why the quote rankles so. Why not both? Why not a time and place for both? Sometimes we need the walls to lean against, sometimes we need the freedom those flights of fancy can take us on. There's no such thing as "ordinary life". Life, in and of itself, is extraordinary. I think the trick is finding the balance in appreciating both the concrete and the clouds.
ReplyDeleteRight on, woman! Why not a time and a place for both? Why don't I ever think of these things? I know that life is extra- ordinary -- it's hard sometimes to feel that though. I like clouds a hell of a lot more than concrete.
DeleteThank you so much for your comments.
I hope there is nothing wrong with being ordinary because that is just what I am! And happy to be ordinary!!
ReplyDeleteI get that - I am really quite ordinary too - salt of the earth is another way of putting it -- thanks for your thoughts.
DeleteI'm ordinary as well—and proud of it!
ReplyDelete