Saturday, August 21, 2010

Veritable Knots

      I was trying to put words on the way my neck and shoulder muscles feel this week and two words fell  off my fingertips and into the text message I was writing:  veritable knots.  Of course, my mind went immediately to the painted image of veritable knots.  I can see it on the paper and, at some point within the next few days, I will  get that image (or something close to it) out of my head and onto the paper.  In the meantime, I am living with both the image of the veritable knots as well as with the real thing.  The muscles in my upper back feel so tight that they should be cutting the skin.  But I am still not sure how they make themselves into knots.....
     Maybe it goes like this.  Maybe the tension surrounding life becomes like a lava flow.  It starts forming when the energy gets squeezed out of the body and melts the muscle tissue.   This lava flow keeps moving as long as the body is in the tense moment.  When the body starts to breathe again, the lava flow cools off and becomes those steel shoulder blades.  But every time the tension starts up again, the lava starts moving again but not in a straight line.  In order to get started, it has to twist a bit and every twist helps make the knots tighter.  And this body becomes tied up in a twisted maze of knots that will not be satisfied until she has had a minimum of two weeks of silent warmth and rest.  Sounds like a wonderfully accurate imaginary explanation to me!
      Why the tension?  Getting up too early, keeping the brain in the computer at work, not getting to walk the puppy, not getting to take a nap in the afternoon, not reading, very little writing, scant painting - ugh.
Mostly I can blame the tension on having to go to work again.  Love the job, hate the lava that the treadmill releases.  Maybe what I need to do is paint Veritable Knots and put it in my office so I have a visual to remind me to walk away and breathe once in a while.

PS:  I will put a photo of  Veritable Knots on this post when I get it done!

 Veritable Knots #1   :)

1 comment:

  1. I'm looking forward to seeing the painting. I hope that you can find a way to reduce the tension and infuse a bit of relaxation into the days. Untie those knots!